There are always tons of things that need to get done and no time for you to do it all.  That’s why you are so persistent in coordinating things with verbal reminders. However, isn’t it true that being a nag is just as bad as being nagged?  Of course it is.  Which can you relate to?  Just in case you’re doing the nagging, here are some tips to redirect your behavior so you can avoid the frustration and resentment that comes with it.

1. The most efficient thing you can do is handle the task you want done, yourself.  In that way, you don’t have to wait, and it will give you some “brownie points” with the family, when you don’t harp on it.

2. Assign chores that you know the person is capable of doing in a timely fashion.  For instance, if you prefer a clean kitchen and your partner likes a clean bathroom, those are the jobs you are both responsible for.

3. Everything does not have to be perfect. Sometimes a partial effort is as good as getting something completely done.

4. Remember that things don’t always have to be done in YOUR time frame, even though you’re sure you know what’s best. Be a little less demanding, and the job will get done, without slacking.

5. The fewer obligations you have, the better.  So don’t overload yourself with commitments that are hard to complete. Learn to say NO.

6. You know you are nagging someone when they tell you so.  It’s not a subtle hint; it’s an outright statement by the person being nagged. Listen to what they’re saying and then “stop.” However, at some point later, have a discussion about how to finish jobs that are important.

Nagging is actually a habit that can be easily broken with mindful awareness.  In other words, catch yourself as you repeat over and over again the job you want done. Know that if you sound like a broken record, the person is probably not really listening.   Ask for things in a playful, sweet tone, rather than with an angry, demanding insistence and you’ll get more positive results.  Maybe the best solution is to work together as a team, coming up with agreed upon compromises, to make peace and harmony in your home an attainable goal.